So, this is my Christmas post. And although I am aware that today is not Christmas, lets just pretend I posted this yesterday and that I don’t have a severe procrastination problem.

But, to be honest, I’m still not really feeling the whole ‘inspirational Christmas post while secretly bragging about all the awesome things you got’ vibe. Maybe that’s just because the coolest thing I got was a pooper scooper.. Whatever, I’m not mad. I’m not jealous of your new TV, that super sweet sports car you got, or whichever gaming system you got. Nah. I’m not bitter.

You know why? Because I’ve got something way cooler. Something I can almost guarantee you don’t.

I’ve got a Christmas Cactus. Who’s jealous now?

I’m sure you all just shed a silent tear or two, wishing that it was YOU who had this magnificent creature. But you know what, since I’m such a genuinely kind person and in the spirit of Christmas, I’m going to share my Christmas Cactus with you.

Oh Christmas Cactus, Oh Christmas Cactus....
Oh Christmas Cactus, Oh Christmas Cactus….

Just like you did when you posted countless pictures of you with all your shiny new toys on every form of social media you could possibly find. Thanks, I really appreciated that.

I’m really not jealous. Obviously.

Merry Christmas!