I love writing. A lot. Like if there was a choice between eternal cheesecake and baby unicorns or being able to pursue my future in writing, I would choose writing.
Isn’t it funny how even when we know what makes us happy, even when we know what we want, we still find ways to sabotage ourselves?
When I started this blog in December, I don’t know exactly what I was looking for or what I expected. But, I do know that this is not it.
Just like every other newbie who is so sure that they have what it takes to rule the blogosphere, I lept in with a post cleverly titled Just an Intro.
It was pathetic.
And, yet, a blogger by the name of Asariels Muse still read it. Not only that, but left a comment. It’s that comment, the first a blogger receives, that really aids you and ruins you at the same time.
When you write something as utterly lame as my intro and manage to receive a comment like Asariel’s, it gives you this false sense of achievement.
With just one post, and hardly any effort, you managed to attain this great honor. That’s how it is for all of us. We didn’t discover reality yet, we still have the idea that we’re pretty much the next big thing. Bow down to us.
I don’t know exactly what it was that finally brought me to the reality of blogging, but eventually I did realize that I wasn’t the only one who could string together a few words.
I discovered that there were people who were more creative than me, people who were more amusing than me, people who could write more powerfully than me.
There were other bloggers out there. What a surprise.
That was when it became clear that I was not the next big thing, and perhaps I wasn’t quite as special as I had thought.
It’s kind of a crushing moment. Has my mom really been lying to me all this time?
But, eventually, I came to the conclusion that quitting then would simply make me more pathetic than any intro post ever written.
Getting to the point. Looking back on those seven months of pointless rants and the occasional piece of writing with some quality, along with the countless amazing posts you’ve written, and the opportunities to connect with you, along with the past two months of general lameness on my part, I would just like to express to you how much I love you.
You are so amazingly talented and you have motivated me to stop being a lazy lump.
That’s quite a lot of power, the laziness is strong with this one.
Use it wisely.
Also, I apologize for misleading you with my title involving llamas.
Yeah, I’m in the wrong here. I SUCK.
Shhhh. Do you hear that? That’s the sound of forgiveness. Screaming and then silence.

Llamas With Hats: Episode 2