Today, on the third of December in the year 2015, I was told that I am too old for naps.

I know. Just take a moment. Read that again.


My apologies, how rude of me to caps lock. But you must understand, I am INCREDIBLY passionate about naps. If you would like further evidence of this fact, I recommend referencing this post in which I turned into the spawn of Satan when my nap time was threatened.


I love naps.

Now, this alone is concerning. The fact that a human who is currently living on this planet, at this very moment sharing our air, believes there is an age restriction on napping, it’s horrifying.

But, perhaps the most disturbing aspect of this event is the fact that this revolting comment came from another teenager. I feel betrayed by my fellow youths. I thought we were all in this together, a united front in defense of our precious daytime sleeping.

It is a necessity!

How else can you expect me to survive this school system? Not even my ten daily pots of coffee can maintain my life force.

Spread the word, my good people. Spread it like a deadly plague, throughout the world.