Once again we are faced with yet another Monday, and once again we are given no choice but to charge valiantly and courageously onward.
Well, I mean, we could always just call in sick. Or say our pet goldfish died. Or that we’re being hunted by a demented man with a machete and it would be putting our fellow peers at risk if we came in to work or school.
Really, all of these are quite believable.
But, being the respectable people that we all most certainly are, we shall not use them.
Oh, I know what you’re all thinking now: Wow. I must be such a strong, responsible, honest, incredible, fantastic, and just generally amazing person to be capable of resisting the temptation . Especially when I’m capable of creating such solid excuses. It’s truly impressive.
Well, those are your words, not mine. I’m much too humble to ever say something such as that about myself. Although, I cannot deny the very truth in it. I am, as you said, honest.
But, alas. I, Sam O. Bscure, also face the struggles just as you mere mortals do.
Now, if you’ll excuse me for a moment, I must climb off of my dangerously high horse so that we can continue on with this post.
Moving on, however, there is something quite serious I would like to share with you. You oh so fortunate souls.
You see, this weekend I had much time to contemplate the meaning of life and all other philosophical things. This often happens when ones wifi goes out for an extended period of time. But, it was during this time that I made a brilliant discovery. And so, it is at this time, on a Monday of all days, that I would like to bestow upon you my most brilliant of wisdom. Oh, look. Back up on that high horse. Darn critter just doesn’t know how to take a hint and leave!
So, without further ado:
A Moment of Truth With Sam
The process of completing anything in life is much like that of dipping a cookie in milk: you can see that in the end, what you achieve will be absolutely magical. But yet, as you near the achievement, you get too greedy and you leave that poor little cookie in the milk. Then, in an instant, it is crumbling into a thousand nasty, soggy chunks. And you are left with nothing more than a pile of grossness and uncontrollable rage filled disappointment.
The moral of this story, my dearest minions, keep your cookies and milk separate!
Oh, and don’t be greedy.
But, mostly the first part.
April 27, 2015 at 5:24 pm
You are an amazing, amazing specimen of human.
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April 27, 2015 at 5:44 pm
You are quite the wonderful specimen as well. xD
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April 28, 2015 at 6:13 am
Aha, merci!
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April 27, 2015 at 4:47 pm
*claps with a tear in his eye* That was a beautiful metaphor. Also the line ‘I must climb down off of my dangerously high horse’ will be with me for a while XD
Also today’s Monday? The concept of days in a week being different to each other is lost on me.
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April 27, 2015 at 5:46 pm
Haha oh, yes. I am quite proud of that line. I’m a true word wizard. xD
And, really, you might want to work on that…
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April 27, 2015 at 9:16 pm
‘Word wizard’ is equally quotable 😀
And shh! I woke up in the morning today, okay – that was a success itself.
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April 27, 2015 at 9:23 pm
Ohhh wow! I am so proud of you! Way to be JC, mah homie! (I made a rhyme)
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April 27, 2015 at 9:24 pm
Your attempt at a rhyme disgusts me.
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April 27, 2015 at 9:25 pm
You disgust me.
And clearly, you don’t appreciate my mad rhyme skills.
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April 27, 2015 at 9:27 pm
Your surname disgusts me. I don’t appreciate that either.
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April 27, 2015 at 9:30 pm
Ohh, well isn’t that taking it a little far? Insulting my surname? (which is obviously actually my surname, and not one I simply made up. That would be ridiculous)
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April 27, 2015 at 9:32 pm
I know right – it’d only be super offensive if I called you out on sketching genuine like your not-ridiculous surname. Take that, Bscure clan!
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April 27, 2015 at 9:33 pm
Bscure clan xD Oh man, that is fantastic!
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April 27, 2015 at 10:01 pm
A proud and historic line, no doubt.
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April 27, 2015 at 10:03 pm
Indeed, this is very true!
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